The following post is from Kat of Inspired To Action:
This isn’t a post about how to have a museum-like home. This isn’t a post about how to make children behave like grown ups. This is a post about how to have peace in the midst of real life.
Step 1: Acknowledge The Crazy
I long to have a peaceful home. I’m guessing that you do to or you would have already clicked away. But “peaceful” in this season of life is going to look different than it did before we had kids.
Peace isn’t reflected in a decibel level or the amount of dust accumulated on your shelves. Peace is a state of the heart. Peace is a tone of voice. Peace is the ease with which we navigate the torrent of our lives.
So, the first path to a peaceful home is to acknowledge the crazy. It’s our job to teach our children how to grow up, but it’s also our job to let them be kids and savor every blessed, messy moment. Peace is finding the balance between the two.
Step 2: Make a Plan
When do you tend to be the most frustrated? Might it be when:
- you’re running late?
- you need the kids to do something….now?
- the kids aren’t listening?
- the house is a mess?
- you are tired?
- the kids are tired?
By taking just a few minutes to plan, we can avoid so much peace-destroying frustration that threatens to enter our homes.
1. Plan to leave 10 minutes earlier than you need to, because kids take longer than we think they will. Always.
2. If you need your child to do something (homework, a chore, etc) ask them to do it before it needs to be done, because kids take longer than we think they will. Always.
3. If you’re kids aren’t listening, write it down. Instead of nagging them about putting their things away when they walk in the door, make a sign. In our mudroom I have a sign listing all the things my kids need to do when they get home from school. That small bit of planning saves so much frustration in our home.
4. Does a messy house frustrate you? Plan ahead. Make a list of all the areas that are them most peace-busting and tackle those first.
5. Plan to get more rest and make sure your children are getting enough rest (many children don’t).
The second path to a peaceful home is planning.
Be Like A Wall of Jello
You can always count on me for the weird analogies. But I hope that the goofiness of this idea will stick in your memory and help you to walk in peace when your home is in the midst of the crazy.
It’s pretty nervewracking to be a mom. It can test every single emotion we have and it’s far and away the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But here’s the thing, we have 20-30 years of life, learning and experience in our favor. Do you remember what it’s like to be a child?
It’s scary. Children are at the mercy of the grownups around them. They have NO idea what is coming next.
It’s overwhelming. Every single day children must learn new things. They must change and adapt at a rate that would leave most adults in the fetal position under the covers of their bed humming Barney songs.
Our children need us to be cool. No, they don’t need us to wear skinny jeans, knee high boots and aviator glasses. They need us to be like a wall of jello. (Stick with me here…)
When our children reach the end of their emotional tank, when they are frustrated and scared and overwhelmed, they need us to NOT be those things. We are their rock. Or their jello, in this case. We need to absorb all their emotions and let it move us, but not break us.
Our children need that….and we need it too.
The third path to a peaceful home is to be like a wall of jello.
The road to a peaceful home is challenging, but the reward is knowing that we are creating a retreat for our family and we are laying a foundation on which our children can thrive.
What is one simple way you make your home more peaceful?
|Kat blogs at Inspired To Action, a site dedicated to helping moms develop the habits and skills they need to effectively manage their homes and raise children who are prepared to change the world. Kat loves music, running, technology, Jesus and Tex-Mex food. Not necessarily in that order.|