As a mom, I am responsible for the wellbeing and development of my children, but I’m also jointly responsible for the same in my marriage. Like most moms, I want to nurture and support my children. By warmth and good humour, physical affection, and a willingness to be human behind the role of ‘mom’ I’m hopeful my kids and my husband know I love them. This love is a feeling, but it is also a choice, and I try to show them all how much I appreciate having them in my life.
Here are 10 free ways to show love and affection to your partner which will enrich your life.
Give your partner your undivided attention when he or she is talking to you, just like you did when you were first dating. Active listening makes for a good relationship as you listen for details and validate your partner.
- Love language
There are different love languages, and most of us fall into one or two of these categories. Learn which one suits, whether it be acts of kindness, physical touch, gifts, or acts of service.
- Accept as well as give
Showing love is not all about giving, it is about receiving too. Otherwise, there is an imbalance in the relationship. The gift of giving is one that many find difficult but here are some ideas on ways to give your partner the world. Accept and appreciate what you are given with kindness.
Frequent touch, whether it’s a brush on the shoulder as you pass in the hallway or a big hug, helps to build affection. Cuddle on the couch while watching your favourite movie and use any opportunity to touch a little more.
- Make time
Sometimes it seems that being a mom takes all your energy. Yet, for a healthy relationship, make time for your partner, make them your priority and set time aside for each other. Make a date for coffee at home or a quiet local place where you can listen to each other. Your relationship needs the investment of time to continue to flourish.
- Eye contact
Remember when your eyes used to lock across the room and you felt loved, seen and validated, even if you were in conversation with another. Having eye contact when you’re talking, and listening is really important. Turn off all electronic devices to avoid distraction, make eye contact and be present for the other, and they will likely be present for you too.
When was the last time you said why you loved someone? Saying “I love you” is great, but what makes us different or special to our partner has a much deeper and meaningful impact, creating and reinforcing a strong emotional bond.
- Actions speak louder than words
When you make time to listen to each other, you can catch little things about them that you can act on. Maybe you saw them glance in a shop window display for something you can surprise them with, for no reason at all.
- Be their champion
Both privately and with others, be their biggest admirer and supporter. Compliments are an act of love, shows that you acknowledge their skills and achievement and will be with them to support them.
- Ask them what they want
Don’t assume that what your partner desires the most is the same as you. Ask how they feel most loved and what type of affection they appreciate, and then you can respond to that.